February-

The month where.....
-the boys have so many basketball games scheduled, either regular games or make-up games due to bad weather, that it seems nary a day goes by that we don't run to practice or games, or piano, or the dentist....

-we get so weary of winter, but below zero temperatures since the beginning of December and lots of snow, remind us that it's not over yet.

-I try to eat next to nothing after 5 PM for a whole week, and after a hunger fit, cave in and eat sweet cereal with the children at 8:30 PM.

-we get 5 baby lambs to bottle feed and several days later, 4 more. Lots of bottles, lots of feedings, and it all gets mixed up in my kitchen sink, and I wonder if the yellow kitchen with hardwood flooring is part barn....Oh, back entrance sink, Where are you?!

-I get away with The Man for a delightful weekend ALONE and we connect on a heart level and talk about baggage and redemption and hope- always HOPE for God to work out His will in our lives for His glory.

-we celebrate rewards earned in the school room with 3 children separately, and 2 of them choose a coffee shop date with Mom, and the third one chooses the Mexican restaurant in town where he orders catfish, and it's a win-win because Mom gets one-on-one time with her children.

-we make homemade noodles at my Mom's with the sister-in-law, and the 4 kids declare noodle making the best activity ever unless you can go play in the snow with your cousins- that's trumps even noodle making!

-we muck through school and I get so discouraged and on one of the very worst days, the dear niece, mother of 4, calls for, yep, you guessed it, homeschooling advice, and I hear God saying that He doesn't want perfection as much as a willing heart.

-the children fight, Mom splits them all up and makes them apologize and play games with each other and takes pictures to remember how sweet and innocent they look.

-I realize how needy and broken I am and how much I need Jesus to help me not raise my voice at my children or tell my husband that he NEVER turns the lights off......(failed!)

-we have an impromptu geography class with Dad at bedtime and dream of going west some day.

-old memories of difficult situations rear their ugly heads and I struggle with trusting God, but I choose to walk by FAITH, and not by sight.

-I preach a sermon to my children about how much God loves them unconditionally and that His love is not dependent on their actions- and then realize how much I needed to hear that myself.

-The dirt under the kitchen table gets so bad that my daughter notices and tells me and I don't even care.

-the oldest daughter dresses up the youngest daughter and puts on a show for the rest of us and it is quite hilarious and entertaining.

-I lower my standards from our traditional Valentines Supper where we invite a family in and have a fancy meal on china to taking the family to Des Moines to a Rend Collective concert and eating at Bonanza. It really was a special evening even if it was not our normal celebration.

-the girls spend hours playing in their house, a cardboard box gifted to them from their friends, Mary and Jon.

-we wake up tired to ANOTHER fresh blanket of snow. It's breathtaking outside but we muck through a lot of ugly inside. Our plans for the day get canceled and it turns out to be a huge gift from God that we get to stay home all day! The sun comes out and the children spend hours outdoors, and even the tired Mom goes out for some Vitamin D.

-I try to take a picture every day of the month and it is a fun way to chronicle the events of each day.

-oldest son shoots his first rabbit and he makes quite delicious eating. (the rabbit, not the son.)

-the littlest daughter has her turn to go on a date with her Daddy.

And that's our month, so far.

January- Hunger Awareness

Every year in January, I like to set a few goals for the month, mainly centered around healthier eating/Daniel Fast related for my own personal self. This year was no exception, but I really wanted it to be a family project. Leon was reading a book called Ten Days Without  by Daniel Ryan Day and he was really challenged by the concept of doing without to raise awareness and make us more grateful people. So all this to say- we came up with Hunger Awareness for the month of January. It was pretty simple and nothing too drastic, but it has been a very good experience for all of us, and one the children won't soon forget.

The end of December I stocked up on some basic grocery items. Aside from milk and eggs, we would not be buying any groceries the month of January. So far I only bought bananas and lettuce.....so I mostly stuck to that plan.

We went 3 days without any sugar. That was really, really good for us and something we could do more often.

We also went 3 days without meat. That was a bit more challenging, but we still ate very well. The chicken pot pie got made without chicken, we enjoyed the rice and beans and eggs and grilled cheese, but the black bean burgers were kind of a stretch. They actually looked and tasted good, but the texture was kind of like mashed potatoes, and it just did funny things to your brain.

We are nearing the end of the month, and yes, I do need to go grocery shopping again. The pantry and fridge are emptier than usual, but we ate very well this month in spite of it. I thought outside of the box and we did without. We saved a lot of money on groceries and all you need to say is 'black bean burgers' and most grumbling ends.:)

I asked the children for their opinions on the month. This is what they came up with:

Brooklyn- "It's hard to go without sugar." (Can you tell she's got a major sweet tooth?)
Annika- "It showed us how some children feel when they don't have some kinds of foods."
Jamison- "It made us aware of how much {we} have. It was a good experience."
Logan- "It made me more grateful. It was all good except for the black bean burgers, and going without sweet tea."

We are still talking of an electronics fast sometime. I really wanted everyone to go to bed hungry at least once this month but that never happened.  The comment was made by one of the children, " But why do that to ourselves if we actually have enough to eat?" Hmm. Still pondering that one.

Remembering December

It was a good month. It was a full month. It was a month of lowering my standards. It was a month to focus on people, not decor or presents.

We baked our traditional cut out cookies one evening. The plans were to bake them in the afternoon but due to my afternoon going to someone who needed to talk, Leon ended up helping the girls and I one evening. It was okay. In fact, it was a very special memory made because we let the 'real' one go.

I got to spend a very special afternoon with a young girl from the city. We tied a fleece blanket for her Mom for Christmas, baked kiss cookies, and played Dutch Blitz.

I made caramels and turtles one day when I had a little extra time. Annika helped me wrap the caramels.

I decorated very simply.

We hosted my sister's family for a Christmas Eve soup supper, which turned into a late night with special nieces and nephews.

We spent a wonderful day at my Mom's on Christmas with my family.

We enjoyed 2 whole weeks of delightful Christmas vacation from school. We played games, read, slept late, played with cousins, and enjoyed the schedule-less life.

Leon and Logan went deer hunting and Leon got a button buck.

The children had their piano recital.

Church was canceled one Sunday and we had a delightful day at home.

The children played in the snow.

We had our traditional family Christmas supper. We ate grilled steak and onion rings and other good food on china and by candlelight. We gave the children gifts.

I found the nativity set one day with all the people turned in. I thought about the significance. I wondered what 2014 would be like if I turned toward Jesus. I wondered what it would be like if I only cared about what He thought.

2013 Review

January

I enjoyed a lunch out with these two special long time friends.

The children enjoyed the snow.

We went to a special banquet put on by three area churches for their youth and youth pastors.

February

More playing in the snow.

March

Annika baked cookies for the first time. She chose Snicker doodles.

We spent a week in South Carolina for Leon's brother Kevin's wedding.

April

We hatched baby chicks in an incubator in the school room.

May

We celebrated Mother's Day.

Annika got to be miniature bride at her Uncle Lowell's wedding.

We planted garden.

June

Leon and I went on a mission trip with our youth group to Phoenix, AZ and did a VBS at Aim Right Ministries. We also got to see the Grand Canyon one day.

July

We started tearing up our kitchen and putting in a new floor. 

We enjoyed a weekend reunion with the extended Bontrager family.

 We had a wonderful evening hiking and picnicking as a family.

 We spent a very cold weekend camping and Leon made the children bows.

August

We babysat for cousins one day.

We took a two day family vacation.

We started school.

September

We went camping with the youth.

 We went swimming for the last time.

October

I helped plan a Ladies Luncheon at church and did an interview with a dear 95 year old lady from church.

 I took the girls horseback riding at our friend Amber's house.

November

We celebrated Thanksgiving with Leon's family. 

 The children enjoyed a pinanta.

December

The girls spent hours playing with their dolls.

And now it's 2014- 

The girls and I had a lovely day at home while the men went to watch the game. 

The new year stretches before us- unknown and uncharted territory. But I am excited about what it may hold. God did so many amazing things for me in the past year and I know He will continue to amaze me in this new year. The best part of all is that I do not have to 'do' this year alone, God will be right beside me every step of the way.

What I've Learned About Organization

This has been brewing in my mind for quite some time. But before I get started, I want you to know that I have not totally achieved this organization thing. I'm still learning. I am a stay at home, home school mother of 4  and a farmer's wife. You may be in a completely different stage and setting. If organization doesn't come easily for you, I will not judge you.

I function best in an organized environment. I have OCD issues with making my bed and a few other things. (well, I thought I did. I just looked up that term and maybe it really doesn't apply. I kinda hope not anyway.) I like order, hate clutter, love schedules, and have passed at least some of this on to my children. Being flexible is not my strong point but God is teaching that one to me in a variety of creative ways.

1. Your children will seldom be neater than Mom.
I have seen this over and over. People tell me that they can't get the children to pick up after themselves or be neat. But one peek at the master bedroom or the kitchen, and you know Mom has higher standards for her kids than she's willing to follow herself. I must set a good example for my children. That means making my bed, hanging up my pj's, putting away my shoes and the like.

2. You can't put things away if you don't know where to put them.
We mom's have to have a plan. Hooks in the bedroom for pj's, hooks in the bathroom for towels, hooks in the entrance for coats. Drawers for gloves and hats, shelves for shoes, baskets for blankets. You get the idea. I am not a fan of toy boxes. Things get thrown in and lost, broken, or ruined. We have totes for lego's and little toy cars, nice cloth bags for the doll clothes, book shelves for the books, and a little kitchen cupboard for the toy dishes. Granted, when we have guests over and it's time to clean up the toys, it can be a little confusing. But we generally help with pick up or send them home and do it ourselves. Who doesn't like to skip that part if you have tired children? Each of the children has their own personal 'treasure drawer' and no one is allowed to dig around in it without permission. This gives them a place to put their stuff.

3. A hamper in each room saves the dirty clothes clutter.
I keep a hamper in each bedroom and each bathroom and I get pretty frustrated if I see dirty clothes on the floor! My children often gather and sort the laundry for the regular laundry days. I have a laundry cart in my tiny laundry room and it makes sorting the clothes very simple.

4.Get rid of clutter. Get rid of clutter.
Oh, did I just repeat myself? I am a bit obsessive about this one and yes, you can ask my husband if this trait has ever caused issues in our marriage. I am a pitch-er! If the dresser drawers won't shut easily, we have too many clothes. I often go through our clothes and consign, or give away what we don't need or wear.  Mail piles up on the kitchen counter and drives me crazy. At least once a week I sort through it and organize and pitch. Several times a week, I make a sweep through the house and gather up the children's paraphernalia and put it on a pile on the table. I give them each a chance to get their stuff and put it away then I pitch the rest.

5. Have regular clean up times.
Like before naps, or before supper or bedtime, designate a room to a child and pick everything up and make it neat and tidy. Sometimes I say, "All hands on deck" and we all pitch in together. Or maybe I'll say everyone has to put away 5 things. It's so much more fun to wake up in the morning and start my day in an un-cluttered house! 

6. Have a meal plan.
I've tried it all- to weekly menus to monthly menus to none at all. Right now, I'm not really planning menus but I do figure out in the morning or the night before what we're having for supper. That way I can have the meat thawed, put in marinade, or whatever it takes. The more of a plan you have, the less grocery trips you have to make for that one elusive item you thought you had. 

7. Teach your children to work.
You don't have to do it all alone. I read once that if you are feeling overwhelmed as a Mom, you need to delegate more responsibility to your children. Of course, all things considered- they may be too young to help and you might need some outside help. But if they are between the ages of 5 and 11, like my children are, there is MUCH they can do. My boys have been cleaning bathrooms for a long time, and all 4 keep their bedrooms clean. 

There is a lot more that could be said about organizing a house. I like to look through the freezers every now and then and use up those forgotten items. And speaking of freezers, mine wouldn't win an award for being neat. I also like to clean out and organize the pantry frequently. I hate throwing food away.
Our mud room is this teeny tiny space that is supposed to store a lot more than it's actually capable of. Depending on what day you visit, you just might be shocked at the condition of that room. I always say you don't need a large space to be organized, but that room makes me wonder. I often feel grumbly inside when I step into that room, but after a thorough scrubbing and organizing and an attitude check about how much I have, I feel content again. First world problems definitely.
I have 2 daughters who are in the pack rat stage right now. It can be super frustrating. When I ask them to clean up their room, they do, but they save a lot more stuff than I would. Several times a year, I go in and clean it out and pack the 'junk' away. I save it in a hidden location for a month or so, just in case I eliminated something precious. I learned that the hard way. Then eventually I get rid of it all.
We have issues sometimes with the children's drawers looking awful. I set up a plan where I would make random drawer checks and reward anyone w/ neat drawers. It was amazing what a couple of quarters could do as an incentive.
I hope this is an encouragement to you with maybe just one helpful idea. We need to figure out what works for us and go with it. Habits form in a month, so one month of consistently adopting a new habit and you're hooked!:) 

How To Decorate

My brain has been begging to blog for days, weeks even. I promised myself a stress free Christmas and so I refused to give in to the blogging urge unless I had time. Today I have time. Today I am relaxing and doing a lot of nothing. I lay in bed until a shocking  hour, washed the sheets, did one load of chore clothes, heated up leftover soup for lunch, invited cousins over to play with the kids, and caught up on blogs and such like online.

Now I have time to blog.

First off, you will probably never come to my house and say, "Wow, if only I could decorate like her." I'm not a super creative artsy Pinterest type person. Oh, I peruse Pinterest, dreaming of the ability or even just the desire to get all crafty. But in the end, I try a new recipe. that's who I am. and I'm okay with it, at least most days.:)

Soon after we got married and were all settled into our old but cozy trailer, I invited my very talented, creative friend to my house, to decorate. I pulled everything out that I owned in that department, and she set to work. When she was done, my house was beautifully decorated. A week went by. I simply could not stand to dust around all the stuff on that shelf. So down came most of it. Soon I was tired of almost cracking my head on the shelf. Down came the whole shelf. After more time had elapsed, I felt this creepy crawly feeling when I looked around my house. Too much stuff! I started taking it down. Soon I was back to where I started before my friend arrived. A light bulb moment happened just then. I can decorate. But I decorate MY way. And I'm happiest in my own house when I decorate it my way.

My Decorating Tips:
1. Be yourself.
2. If you like it, it's great.
3. Be yourself. (Am I repeating myself?)

Over the years I have discovered my style. It's all about simple, clean, and cheap. Please forgive me if this offends you.:) I may 'blow' my money in areas that you would find offensive. But seldom will I spend money on decorating my house.

As a woman, I know all about competition. I love to go to Elaine's house or Mary Beth's house or Fannie Ellen's house or Char's house, where everything is tastefully decorated. They have a gift, unique to them. I love to soak in the beauty when I'm there. But I operate best when I am me, and when I decorate my house according to what suits me best.

We as women would do well to stop the competition, the 'she has-I want-I need' mentality. We can serve God best by using our own gifts and talents. I want you to feel loved and cared for at my house. I want my house to feel like a safe, comforting, and fun place to be. I want you to experience God's love through me and my family's actions of service to you.

And you know what?

I'm not even offended if you don't like my decorating style.

Losing Brittany

This past week has seemed really long for me, but not nearly as long as it has seemed to my friends, Randy and Lavertta. Last Sunday morning, their 15 year old daughter Brittany, was in a car accident with her 2 cousins. A drunk driver hit them and Brittany was life flighted to the hospital, where she died soon afterward. The cousins were injured but not in serious condition.

As I wrestled with the whole situation, I kept thinking, This is not how it is supposed to end. We pour into our children's lives, praying that they will grow up to follow God and raise their own family some day. We smile at the thoughts of weddings and grand babies in the future. We never entertain the thought of burying them at the age of 15.

Ultimately, it didn't end there. We know that. What Satan intended for evil, God can use for good. Brittany is in Heaven with Jesus, and she won the final victory against Satan.

I grew up with Brittany's mom, and we spent a lot of time together in the youth group. I was in their wedding party 19 years ago. I can't tell you how much it hurt to see Vert go through this. I heard her say that if only one person comes to Jesus, Brittany's death will not be in vain. And then she added, "But oh! How are we going to let her go?"

How do you let your 15 year old daughter go? How do you watch your children go through the intense grief of losing their beloved sister? How do you send your children out the door to school for the first time without her? How do you get through walking past her room, or cleaning out her suitcase, or finding her things lying around the house? How do you watch her friends cope with the huge loss they are facing? How do you laugh and smile again? How do you celebrate Christmas? And how are you supposed to ever enjoy the Thanksgiving Holiday weekend again?

The funeral service was very meaningful. As we sang a song about God's Grace at the start of the service and I saw Brittany's dad raise his hands in worship to God, I completely lost it. A man who has lost so much, yet he is praising God in the midst of it all. This is not some superficial faith he's got. It's the real deal. God has carried the family through these past few days in nothing short of a miraculous way. The strength they portrayed  in the midst of their raw grief was not their own.

And now I'm home again. What effect does Brittany's death have on me?

Last week I struggled so much with being a Mom. It felt like I was impatient and frustrated all the time. It felt like the issues we were dealing with in our children were huge. I felt like I was in a huge battle and I was handling everything all wrong.

Brittany's death has been a huge reminder for me to enjoy today, now, with my children. I've been reminded to focus on what's going on in their hearts instead of the outward actions I'm seeing. I've been challenged to say less and hug more.

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.      Hebrews 12:1-2