This Christmas Season...

I have been reminding myself that...

•  Simple is best, online shopping is good, and gift cards make nice gifts
• Two batches of Christmas cookies are plenty
• A clean house is better than a perfectly decorated one (of course, if you can have both, good for you)
• Making treats with the children is a lot of fun

• Mud will not steal my joy, mud will not steal my joy, mud will not..... (we are building a chicken barn and have mud and dirt everywhere due to a very warm December, but it could be worse, it could be snow!)
• My children are beautiful (even if their clothes are not new or perfectly coordinated) 

• My beautiful Advent devotional can be read in January
• Kind words to my children are better than perfect schedules
• Listening to Brooklyn read to me, s-l-o-w-l-y sounding out words, is a privilege
• Always-dead batteries in my camera mean I have creative children taking many hilarious video clips 
• Soup and bread make a fine meal for guests
• A tea party with the nieces is a special privilege even when you think you're almost too busy to plan it
• Busy Daddy's who read to their little girls are pretty special

• God is Peace, and Hope, and Everything I need

And just because I like us.......

When Life Stinks, God is Still Good

Lately life has felt like one of those spinning tea cups at the Iowa City Park. Seriously, if I list all the bad, I shock even myself.

• our lead pastor resigned at church
• my electric knife quit
• my stove totally kicked the bucket
• our van's back door stopped closing correctly
• we had a water leak in our upstairs bathroom, totally unknown to us, and it seeped under the floor, until the ceiling sagged and came down in the downstairs bathroom, so for the last 3 weeks, we only use the upstairs shower
• the dryer had a frightening noise every time it started
• the porch railing completely fell apart and we had to wait an extra 2 weeks for the new posts to come in and then we had to wait another 2 weeks for it to get repaired
• the electric guys decided our open trenches waiting for them to put in underground lines were no big deal, and so we have had a portion of our yard torn up for weeks and weeks now
• the chicken house building project continues and keeps adding various stress to my dear husband
• Leon has spent hours and hours in the combine this fall, and I totally felt like a harvest widow
• I got the sorest throat I've ever had in my life and felt sick for over a week
• our two adorable baby kitties both died due to our naughty puppy's antics

But unless you should even squeeze out the tiniest bit of sympathy for me, let me be the first to tell you that God is good. And we are incredibly blessed. I don't think it was a coincidence that in the last several months I read an amazing book  called Face to Face With Jesus. Hearing her tell her personal story of being a Christian in the middle East was completely thought-provoking! I am so thankful that the same Jesus who performed countless miracles on her behalf, is the same Jesus I serve. And He's doing miracles right here in America, too. I also read The Hardest Peace.  Wow! What an incredible story of a mother of 4, dying from cancer unless God does a miracle, and how in the hardest places we find peace. I was inspired and encouraged so much- to live each day intentionally, and to just be kind to my children. We admire people who have gone through intense difficulty and come out with an amazing Jesus story. But I want the Jesus story without the pain. I'm forgetting that the deepest peace comes out of the deepest pain.

I told Leon recently that I just want the hard to stop. He reminded me that as long as we have life and breath, we are engaged in a battle. We can fight with our arms hanging down, or we can fight like the warriors God has called us to be. It's true. We are never promised easy. We are promised that God will be with us. And it's Him living in us that makes all the difference. He lives through us, wins our battles, and fights for us. But we can't walk around in defeat.

A lot of my list of hard stuff at the beginning of this post is so, so trivial. First world problems. I would be lying to say that I took each new 'broken' piece in stride. But that stuff cannot take my peace. My peace does not come from my circumstances all being honky-dory. My peace comes from the One who holds everything in His hand.

My husband fixed the electric knife, the van, and the dryer, and the bathroom is still an on-going process, our youth group blessed our socks off and gave us a monetary gift to replace the stove, the porch and trenches are out of my control so I may as well not fret.......and harvest is OVER for this year!!!

We had a lot of HAPPY mixed into this tough stuff.

One Sunday we just took the day off- for us. We had a special meal at a Mexican restaurant, hiked and took photos at the reservoir, and came home and watched a movie.

We had a couple family game nights sprinkled in too. We took advantage of every rain that kept Leon out of the field.

And there are always good books to read....

Brooklyn is learning how to read like a pro-

We enjoyed the baby kittens for a short time.

We took the day off of school and toured the Herbert Hoover Museum.

Here we're posing after a Sunday afternoon run-

 This is how Leon feels sometimes when the women in his house get crazy!

And this is how certain family members eat their caramel dip.

God is good! All the time. God is good!

random {that very overused word of the day}

I feel like I must write. I haven't really blogged in so long. It's very theraputic for me.  I have an extremely busy week and it seems like this is perhaps the last thing I should do. I'm forgetting the to-do list for just a minute and giving myself 10 minutes to rant about random things in my life.

The timer just went for the pie crust I'm baking. I love, love having frozen pie crusts in the freezer for desserts at busy times. Tonight the pie will become a peanut butter cream pie and hopefully grace the table of one of our pastor's family's for a belated Pastor Appreciation meal that was supposed to happen back in October.

I want to do some Christmas baking. I have to make cut-out cookies. It's a family tradition around here and I know better than to mess with those. I also want to make party mix and those Peanut Butter Blossom cookies.

Logan's basketball consumes way more of my time than I like. Running him to practice 4x a week is so NOT my cup of tea. But watching him get to play last week made up for it. (sort of) It's been a dream of his for a very long time and I love the good things he can learn in sports.

We had steaik fajitas for lunch and if I ever overeat, you can blame Mexican food.....or steak and potatoes...or salad..or grilled chicken....or fresh homemade bread....Sometimes I wish for no appetite, but then I remind myself that only the sick people have no appetite so maybe it's not a bad thing, as long as I control it.

Thursday looms before me like a giant monster stalking me...coming closer and closer. Yes, a dentist appointment is on the schedule for the afternoon. I never had a cavity until a year ago, of course if you didn't go to the dentist for 8 years before that you don't know what you have, :) but suddenly I learned about cavities and root canals and I do not like it. Not one little bit.

Why do some people have such a hard time being okay with their past and where they've come from? It's all part of our story and most of us can find at least a  little bit of good in how we were raised. I feel sad for people who spend their whole life running away from it and missing the good parts along the way.

Relationships can be tricky no matter where you are at in life. Getting along w/ people is not an art you learn overnight. Usually honesty is the best policy, but then that's the way I roll. For you, that may be totally offensive. I just don't like when I feel your frustrations toward me but to my face you are all friendly and sweet.

Last night I poured out all my woes of my busy week to my kind husband. He listened, and offered a bit of advice, but I felt so much better afterwards. He has been so helpful when I get overwhelmed and he is my solid rock more times than I can count.

It's really hard for me to admit when I am busy or overwhelmed. I am a firm believer that people choose the life they live and for some people being insanely busy is their status symbol, the way they are known. Count me out. I want to enjoy life. But having said that, sometimes life happens and things come up that are not in our control and that's okay too. Sometimes.

There is nothing worse than a whiney, fussy girl on a Sunday morning unless you make that two whiny fussy girls. For real. I think Satan just walks in here on Sunday mornings and tries so hard to rule the roost and too many times I'm too dumb to notice it was him until it's all over.

Watching people interact with my children is the coolest thing. I hope my children grow up to take an interest in other people's children. What a blessing and example youth can be to younger children! We are so, so blessed with a youth group that loves our kids and not just in a crazy, 'I'll have fun with you ' kind of way, but 'I'm reallyt interested in you and your life'.

My 10 minutes are up, my brain is a little de-fuzzed and I'm off to tackle the next project.

My Title-less Post

So my title could be:

Stuff I've Learned in The Past Week
or
God Is Always Enough
or
Why Don't my Leaves Blow Away Before I Have To Rake Them?
or
I Love/Hate Harvest
or
Why Mom's Must Get Up Before Their Children
or
Just How Crazy is a Home School Mom
or
The Work It Takes To Run a House
or
Why Don't These Mice Change Their Address?
or
My Over-Due Brain Dump

but...
none of these titles seemed quite right so I crossed them off one by one and left my post title-less. Don't say you weren't warned.

This has been an incredibly beautiful fall with lovely weather. Leon has been busy harvesting. I am so tired of packing lunches. He says he's more tired of eating them. Is that even possible? He has never enjoyed sandwiches and altho' I think I've been pretty creative, he still prefers sitting down at the kitchen table for lunch. Here are some of this year's options: ham and cheese, ham wraps, burritos, grilled hamburgers, hot ham and cheese, quesadillas, philly cheese steak, and BLT's. Add some fresh from the garden peppers or radishes, chips, an apple, maybe a granola bar......and well, it's still a packed lunch. That's alright. I love my meat-and-potato-man.

I helped my mom with a group today again. It takes a lot of effort to race out the door before lunch and hope that my students can take their work along and finish it there. I love to help her, but I really love to stay at home. Today I mopped all her hardwood floors and cleaned her bathrooms. My girls love using her feather duster and dust mop. Annika asked her if she would pay them. I was horrified. I don't want my children to expect pay from Grandma for doing stuff for her, but she nearly always pays them something so I'm having a hard time getting this across. I discovered one son took his wallet along today so he would have a safe place for his money when Grandma pays him! HELP! But all that cleaning and working away makes me come home tired and not wanting to do even one thing in my own house. It's raining and so when my farmer husband came home, I said to him, "The kids are watching a movie, I'm exhausted, there's nothing made or planned for supper, and welcome home."  Yes, those were my exact words. Judge me, if you will. He said, "Why don't I run to town and get pizza for supper and pick up that contact solution that you need so desperately?" I couldn't say yes fast enough. This is very uncharacteristic of him, but I'm just lovin' it!

I let the girls pick out knit fabric at Jo-Ann's last week. Annika picked out a fruity/flowery summer print. Would you or would you not make this into a long sleeved winter dress? Sigh. She has her heart set on it so I'll probably go ahead. Note to self: Do not let girls pick fabric unless you are really going to be okay with whatever they choose.

We have a mouse problem in our house like never before. I hate mice! Leon uses the BB gun on them if they dare stick their heads out. So far, he's killed 2 that way and it's been mess-free. I won't mention how many he just gave a severe headache to in his quest to kill but not to splatter. All I can say is, if we have mice, we don't have snakes. Oh, old house, how I love thee!

I deep cleaned my house the middle of July. I had several young girls come and help me for a few days. That works best for this home school mama. But now it's starting to look and feel dirty again and everyone else is cleaning and I almost feel like I should clean again but I remind myself that it's all done already. You cannot make me feel guilty, you cobwebs in the corner.

We were commissioned last month as youth pastors. We are actually part of a youth pastor team. It's been quite a journey....God has an amazing way of working. I would never in my wildest imaginations have dreamt we would do something like this. But the way God leads doesn't always make sense. After the initial overwhelming feelings of this job being bigger than us, (which it is) and questioning our own capabilities, (still do) we are actually starting to enjoy this opportunity a lot. We are still getting to know the youth group which has it's pro's and con's. They are still getting to know us as well. But it feels so good to be used by God and to hear His voice. Unless you've walked with us through the past number of years, that may not make a lot of sense to you.

My oldest son cooked our evening meal  one night this week. His menu was: Little Cheddar Meat loaves, Baked Potato Slices, and Cheesy Green Beans. He labored long over that meal and totally regretted having chosen such a detailed menu. At the table he said, "Wow, Mom, I didn't know you have to work that hard to make a meal for us." I'm thinking, "And that wasn't even hard. That's why I have you cook, so you learn how AND so you appreciate what others do for you."

If I'm growing in my relationship with God, and feeling His presence in my life every day, not to mention having prayers answered in amazing{little}ways, then how come certain relationships are just plain hard? A lot of thoughts like these went through my head recently. And it seemed like I heard God say, "Do you think these things are too hard for Me? " And I felt chastised. Really, God wants to be involved with every detail of my life. He cares about my relationships even more than I do.

Surrender. Been thinking a lot about surrender. Giving up. Leaving my agenda for God's agenda. Not surrendering so I get what I want in the end. Total surrender. Ouch.

Could it be that when I am the most judgemental is when I am taking my eyes off of the Grace I've been given? I cannot give something I don't have.

This seems like enough of a brain dump for one day. Boy, do I feel better. Even if nobody reads this, I sat down and put some of my thoughts into sentences. That is therapy for me.

Today

Today was a most unusual day here at our house.

About 6 months ago, when our children were going through a time of grumbling about having to work around the house, my husband and I hatched this crazy idea. Sometime we would have a "Do What You Want" Day. The children could do whatever they wanted all day. They could get up when they wanted, wear what they want, eat what they want, and choose their own activities for the day. The only rule was that I couldn't do anything for them. We did make an exception for Miss Brooke, who is only 3.

Today was the day. Oh, boy.

The children were so excited about this 'awesome' day, as they dubbed it. They slept in a little, watched lots of movies and played computer games, wore jammies all day, didn't comb their hair or brush their teeth, and ate lots of eggs! Logan had scrambled eggs for breakfast and supper and he made 2 egg sandwiches inbetween. We are an egg-lovin' family, but seriously, if I served only eggs for an entire day, I think I'd be in trouble. The others ate lots of eggs too.;)

The messy house, well, about drove me crazy. The children's beds didn't get made, and the kitchen looked like a war zone. I just tried not to go in there very much. I also got to choose my daily activities. I discovered that since I didn't have to cook, I definitely had more free time. I started the day with a run. I managed to sew 2 little flowergirl dresses for the girls as well. I was very thrilled to be able to cross that off my to-do list. The dresses are very simple, but needed to be lined. They still need zippers, hems, and sashes, but I think I can manage that sometime in the next 30 days.

Lesson learned? By tonight, my listless children were getting bored. And a little grouchy. And maybe tired of eggs? Perhaps even ready to have a new day tomorrow, where Mom has lists of chores and we keep the house looking like a place we want to live in.

I suspect they won't forget this day for a long time. I even suspect they will talk about it to everyone, making it sound like an amazing experience. I suspect they are also glad it was only for today. I sure am.