Life at our House

It's been a long time since I sat down and blogged. The urge to write is still here, but it seems a lot wiser and safer to write in my journal. 

We are currently in a state of transition in our family....visiting churches and seeking God's Will for our future. This stage of life has come with a lot of peace. I know that our choices make little sense to the people around us, but we aren't living our lives for people, but to glorify Jesus.

School: The girls and I have been doing the "Adventures in U.S. History" (My Father's World) this year and it has been so much fun again. I did this curriculum with my boys when they were in 1st and 2nd grades and they still talk about the things we did that year.

Here they are with their ships, the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria.

We made ink from mashed up raspberries one day, and then wrote our names with a feather pen dipped into our 'ink'.

We also made homemade bread and butter. 

And johnny cakes, too.....

This is how we do school around here sometimes....

Farm Life: The Farmer tried to finish harvesting for several weeks but if the beans weren't too wet, then he had a break down, but as of last week, we can honestly say we're done!!! Yay!!

When the Farmer works late, we try to make fun things happen around here. Sometimes we hang out with friends....

or play the Farming Game and drink Pumpkin White Hot Chocolates....

Or we can always take pictures with Mom's camera....

There are books to read....

 and knitting to try out...

and always, always, kittens to play with....

We can have a  tea party with our dolls, too.

Somehow I don't take pictures of my hard-working boys who cleared the garden, mowed the yard, and raked the leaves. These boys can do all the chores on the farm now, by themselves. Just tonight I was informed that Logan has been giving shots to sick pigs when he chores for several years now. I am impressed. 

I've been trying harder to involve my girls in the kitchen. They definitely show interest and it's often just a matter of me taking the time to show them how and let them be creative.

Here Annika is mixing up granola-

The girls making scrambled eggs...

Leon's youngest brother got married last weekend, and we all had a wonderful but packed weekend, celebrating with family. Now this week has been a drag....getting back into the swing of things and catching up on sleep. Annika said on Monday morning, "Mom, I just feel grouchy." I understand, dear daughter, I understand.

I read some really amazing stuff this morning and have been thinking about listening to God's voice... (however much thinking that was possible to squeeze into my morning of doing school and running a house..:)) Many different 'voices' will try to tell us how to live our lives, but there's only one Voice to tune in to...the Voice of Jesus. The Bible says, "My sheep KNOW my voice, and they follow me." I quote from Jesus Calling, "Be content to be a simple sheep, listening for My voice and following Me." And that's enough for me....

Just Me and My Thoughts

I feel dangerous tonight...like maybe I shouldn't be left alone.

Don't call 911 just yet. Let me explain.

Several days ago I blogged. Before I hit publish, I had my husband proof read it. He said it was too, umm, what was the word, raw? I am grateful for his wisdom. It now sits neatly in my Drafts. Maybe you'll see it someday, maybe you won't.

My mind has truly been a whirlwind lately. Sometimes the best way for me to clear my mind is to write.

Recently I explained to my teenage son the way a woman's brain functions versus a man's brain. He thought it was funny. Sometimes my husband finds it funny too; other times it can just be really frustrating.

So let's see, just this week alone, I contemplated the exciting and scary adventure called high school that awaits us just around the corner, I counseled my daughter on the importance of taking your anger to Jesus instead of taking it out on others, I advised my son that if he teased his sisters one more time, well, he didn't even want to imagine what the consequence would be, I explained to a struggling child how I understand the stage of these tough growing up years and how the most important thing to remember is that God loves you and Mom and Dad love you, I banned the use of electronics for an entire 3 hour block, I sent the second grader to the principal's office, (only to hear her sister say, "I would do ANYTHING to get sent to the principal!) and I taught my son, who's as big as me, how to fold a blanket.

I reminded my children to empty the dishwasher, burn the trash, MAKE THE BED, put away their shoes, stop teasing each other, stop laughing at her, and just STOP looking at her altogether!

I messed up more times than I can count, felt like I deserved the Bad Parent Award and have perhaps messed up my children enough to make a counselor cry.

But my mind is still a whirlwind and sometimes I just want to.stop.thinking.

If I had a "man-brain", could I just shut all the boxes and think "nothing"?! I know someone like that. :) I envy him.

I want to be a prayer warrior, an encouraging friend, and able to speak truth in love to those around me. I want to be sensitive to other's needs, and sensitive to the Holy Spirit's nudge to be obedient to whatever He asks me to do.

I want to love people like Jesus loves people. I want to be that listening ear, trusted friend, that many long to have.

But this week, I've struggled to just be.

And once again, God has gently reminded me that it's okay to 'take a break' because of our own pain. It's okay to sit back and let someone else do the loving, the encouraging, even the praying, for a time.

I want to just lean in hard on Jesus, and He will gently heal the hurt. I know He will. And someday I'll look back on this season of my life, and I'll remember the pain. I'll also remember the promise, and the Hands that never let go.

I read something this week in Jesus Calling that I just had to highlight:
 "I did not design the human mind to try to figure out the future. That is beyond your capability. I crafted your mind for continual communication with Me. Bring Me all your needs, your hopes, and fears. Commit everything into My care. Turn from the path of planning to the path of Peace."

And so tonight, I will sleep peacefully in the arms of My Abba Father.

Just a Peek ....

...into our lives.

We finished up school, all 168 days of it, and I breathed a deep sigh of relief and gratitude and even a bit of I-almost-can't-believe-it's-been-seven-years-of-educating-our-children-at-home....all kinds of feelings going on here. 

We wrapped up school with a wild and crazy morning, walked out the door, and didn't look back for a week. I cautiously entered the room a week later, and cleaned, and sorted, and organized, then ordered all my curriculum for next year, and now we have a quiet school room, which appears to be the most peaceful room in the house. Don't be fooled! This little room, painted aqua, to encourage peaceful learning, has housed most every kind of emotion out there. We've laughed a lot, cried at times, and increased our academic abilities too. We've learned kindness and perseverance along the way, and talked about real and messy and Jesus and forgiveness. It is a hallowed spot at times, and total chaos at other times. 

But I love my job of being a home-school-stay-at-home mom and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

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We had such lovely weather the week we finished up school, and the garden was begging to be planted, so we all headed out there and got that project taken care of. It is such therapy for me to work in the soil on lovely spring days!

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The girls have been working so hard preparing for their home school choir's production of Rats! and we enjoyed their performance so much!

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We are also in the throes of preparing for our youth group mission trip to Nicaragua in June, so one weekend in April found us grilling 1000 lbs. of chicken and selling meals on a donation basis.

Last weekend we put on a volleyball fundraiser and hosted 16 teams for a tournament. Have I ever told you how much I detest fundraising? I'll keep that to myself. 

However, God has done some amazing things for us in the area of finances and it's not a coincidence to have your plane tickets drop $80 a ticket or have anonymous gifts of $1000 towards the trip.

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Immediately after school was out, the boys went on a 24 hour 'survival' camp-out with their friend Lucas. They took bare necessities with them and no food. Leon put a rooster in a cage and replicated a pheasant nest with 2 dozen real eggs in it, and they had to find the food and prepare it. This included butchering the chicken. Leon snuck back during the night and left MRE's (military meals) for them also. It was an experience they won't ever forget and I was quite proud of them! 

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The girls enjoyed a picnic in the dandelions while the boys were camping.

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On May the 5th, we recognized the 30th anniversary of my dad's death. It is surreal to think that it has actually been that long. We made a little time to go to the graveyard and remember the grandpa that my children never got to meet.

***************************************************** We had plans for lunch on Mother's Day, but in the evening we enjoyed supper out and a lovely walk downtown. I was just made to realize once again how blessed I am, that I get the privilege of being a Mom. 

Life is heavy at times with questions and disappointments and broken dreams. I believe that God wants to prosper us and pour out His blessings on our lives. I've come to discover that it's ok to ask God "Why?". But at the end of the day, it's about trust. Trust, no matter what. Today, I choose {once again} to trust. Even when it doesn't make sense. And I am filled with peace.

"Rejoice in the Lord always, again I will say, Rejoice. Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."   Phil. 4:4-7

When Life Stinks, God is Still Good

Lately life has felt like one of those spinning tea cups at the Iowa City Park. Seriously, if I list all the bad, I shock even myself.

• our lead pastor resigned at church
• my electric knife quit
• my stove totally kicked the bucket
• our van's back door stopped closing correctly
• we had a water leak in our upstairs bathroom, totally unknown to us, and it seeped under the floor, until the ceiling sagged and came down in the downstairs bathroom, so for the last 3 weeks, we only use the upstairs shower
• the dryer had a frightening noise every time it started
• the porch railing completely fell apart and we had to wait an extra 2 weeks for the new posts to come in and then we had to wait another 2 weeks for it to get repaired
• the electric guys decided our open trenches waiting for them to put in underground lines were no big deal, and so we have had a portion of our yard torn up for weeks and weeks now
• the chicken house building project continues and keeps adding various stress to my dear husband
• Leon has spent hours and hours in the combine this fall, and I totally felt like a harvest widow
• I got the sorest throat I've ever had in my life and felt sick for over a week
• our two adorable baby kitties both died due to our naughty puppy's antics

But unless you should even squeeze out the tiniest bit of sympathy for me, let me be the first to tell you that God is good. And we are incredibly blessed. I don't think it was a coincidence that in the last several months I read an amazing book  called Face to Face With Jesus. Hearing her tell her personal story of being a Christian in the middle East was completely thought-provoking! I am so thankful that the same Jesus who performed countless miracles on her behalf, is the same Jesus I serve. And He's doing miracles right here in America, too. I also read The Hardest Peace.  Wow! What an incredible story of a mother of 4, dying from cancer unless God does a miracle, and how in the hardest places we find peace. I was inspired and encouraged so much- to live each day intentionally, and to just be kind to my children. We admire people who have gone through intense difficulty and come out with an amazing Jesus story. But I want the Jesus story without the pain. I'm forgetting that the deepest peace comes out of the deepest pain.

I told Leon recently that I just want the hard to stop. He reminded me that as long as we have life and breath, we are engaged in a battle. We can fight with our arms hanging down, or we can fight like the warriors God has called us to be. It's true. We are never promised easy. We are promised that God will be with us. And it's Him living in us that makes all the difference. He lives through us, wins our battles, and fights for us. But we can't walk around in defeat.

A lot of my list of hard stuff at the beginning of this post is so, so trivial. First world problems. I would be lying to say that I took each new 'broken' piece in stride. But that stuff cannot take my peace. My peace does not come from my circumstances all being honky-dory. My peace comes from the One who holds everything in His hand.

My husband fixed the electric knife, the van, and the dryer, and the bathroom is still an on-going process, our youth group blessed our socks off and gave us a monetary gift to replace the stove, the porch and trenches are out of my control so I may as well not fret.......and harvest is OVER for this year!!!

We had a lot of HAPPY mixed into this tough stuff.

One Sunday we just took the day off- for us. We had a special meal at a Mexican restaurant, hiked and took photos at the reservoir, and came home and watched a movie.

We had a couple family game nights sprinkled in too. We took advantage of every rain that kept Leon out of the field.

And there are always good books to read....

Brooklyn is learning how to read like a pro-

We enjoyed the baby kittens for a short time.

We took the day off of school and toured the Herbert Hoover Museum.

Here we're posing after a Sunday afternoon run-

 This is how Leon feels sometimes when the women in his house get crazy!

And this is how certain family members eat their caramel dip.

God is good! All the time. God is good!